Sojourn Journaling: Day One

Subject: Soul
Related: People, Fix, Beliefs

These three words came up when I rolled the dice today. I played with their order to find the message they held for me, as this is supposed to be about how the three words relate to the subject (Soul today) and my life.

People, Fix, Beliefs - "People, you need to fix your beliefs." No, that's not a message for me. It's not my place to tell people what they need to do. It's none of my business what they believe.

Belief, People, Fix - Yes, I believe people can "fix". That's why I do the work that I do. But, where is the action in that for me?

Fix, People, Beliefs - Again, this is still are not resonating for me. I read it again, waiting for a reaction from my soul. My soul fancies itself a teacher, and my work undeniably creates shifts in people's beliefs about themselves and the world... but, there's something gross here. Reading it again, I find some frustration around the fixing. So, I read them once more... and then again, "Fix, People, Beliefs."

What is that sensation? Oh, yes... resentment. I feel it surging defensively throughout my body, but why? Why am I pissed about the idea of fixing people's beliefs?

I can't fix people if they don't want to be fixed? "Go deeper," I hear.

I can't fix people if they don't believe that they can be fixed? Nothing. I can't fix people if they won't hire me? I am so damn sick of worrying about people hiring me. This can't be where the dice are trying to lead me. What is the freaking problem here? Again, I ask the dice, "Why can't I 'Fix, People, Beliefs'?"

Finally, I see. I can't fix people... because they are not broken. "Remember, this is supposed to be about your soul," the voice inside me whispers.

I can't fix me... because I am not broken.

Relief washes over me. I am not broken. "They" are not broken. We are not broken. This journey is about healing, about returning to the soul, not fixing.

I rotate the dice once more: Fix, Belief, People - Yes, I can fix my beliefs about people. In fact, I just did.

Read more about this Sojourn Journaling Challenge here...